If you could all move in a little bit, that way I won’t have
to yell. I have a little bit of a dilemma to share with you. Goodness, sir,
please keep your pants on! I said
dilemma
; that’s why you all need
to come just a little closer.
Okay,
that’s better. Here’s my problem. Every writing class I’ve ever taken has
stressed this mantra: Show, don’t tell. And yet this article is about office
tours—an activity that is all about show
and
tell.
And
so let me tell you that we currently find ourselves in the lede—or lead—of the
article. Here is where you get a sense of what the piece is about and where I
hopefully grab your attention. To do that, I need a catchy line, perhaps
something along the lines of, “Welcome to the World’s Greatest Sales Centre.”
Okay, if you’re still with me, please turn the page to a
quick little paragraph that will give you a sense of the article to come. Alright, here we are in what is known as the nut graph
—aren’t you starting to
feel like
insiders
?
Many
corporations—IBM, Hydro-Québec, the Arizona State Credit Union—offer tours to
industry groups or visiting dignitaries, but an increasing number of companies
are opening their doors to the general public. These corporate tourists are
generally interested in how businesses create cultures, motivate employees, or
are looking for a little mentoring.
These
are perfectly legitimate reasons, according to Donna McFadden, president of
Toward Excellence Inc. Her company offers training to budding entrepreneurs and
routinely sends them on tours at Vancouver-based 1-800-GOT-JUNK? to get a sense
of how that business functions and how it treats its employees. Then
there’s good old-fashioned voyeurism. I mean, who hasn’t felt the urge to walk
through the “Employees Only” door? I thought so. Now,
just a few housekeeping items and we’ll be on our way.
You
shouldn’t really hold out hopes of finding a job on one of these tours.
Businesses have much more sophisticated means of recruiting employees. In fact,
Brian Scudamore, the founder of 1-800-GOT-JUNK?, says he would “have some
misgivings about a person on a tour with his company who said he wanted to work
for us.”
Nor should you be looking at these tours as a means of
dealing with your own workplace stress. That is simply too complicated an
issue. There can be myriad causes—some personal, and we’re all on vacation here
so let’s keep things light—of that stress. If you don’t believe me, take it
from a clinical psychologist who deals with workplace mental health.
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